Two Disappointments

I got my tooth pulled yesterday and it didn't provide me as much inspiration as I had hoped. Only the radio playing "If I lay here" by Chasing Cars which was ironic as I was laying on the chair. The procedure took less than half an hour. Three shots of numbing and a few quick tugs pulled my tooth out. After surturing my gum shut the dentist gave me the okay to go home. No mess, no fuss, just a go bag with gauze for my mouth. I slept for two hours and woke up with a nasty wad of bloody, wet, gauze swishing around my teeth. I spat it out and got another. Today, the hole in my mouth is mostly closed. There's no more blood or any flesh flopping around in my mouth like the last time I got a tooth pulled. Now I need to wait and heal so I can get the implant. I look silly if I open my mouth too much with that gap in my molars. But I'm really disappointed that the experience didn't provide me a lot of inspiration. Maybe it was the lack of pain in the procedure.

The second thing I'm disappointed in is this manga I'm reading called "Living Together with the Queen from My High School Days Who was Arrogant, Surprisingly isn't That Uncomfortable." That's a mouthful. A man in college named Yamamoto meets the high school beauty at the convenience store he works at. The girl, Hayashi Megumi, has noticable bruises on her arms and legs. He offers her a place to stay to escape her abuser and she accepts. Thus begins a heart-warming relationship between the two. I've got two major problems with this series, maybe a few minor ones as well. The story has only provided one example of the two interacting in high school. It's a scene where Yamamoto gives Megumi the eraser she dropped. Hayashi returns his kindness with a nasty glare for daring to interact with her. That's it. That's all the two have interacted so far. Maybe it would have been more impactful if they had interacted more. But while people often judge on first impressions but, to me, it would make it more poignent if there were multiple insteractions and Yamamoto has to work through each. Like if she had said something bad about him behind his back and he would have to deal with that in a different way. Maybe it was a misunderstanding or maybe she appologizes for her actions. But we only have the eraser incident. To add on to that, there aren't many flashbacks to highschool. It would make more sense if Yamamoto had friends or hobbies but the manga describes him as a loner who loves to clean. He's a blank slate for the reader but he's so blank that it's hard to see him develop over time or even change. Shouldn't there be more people to connect to? The second big complaint I have is how Yamamoto "saves" Megumi. I don't care for characters with the savior complex. I prefer the Miyazaki's way to approach boy and girl relationships. He's said that he's always seen his characters as someone who needs a friend, not rescue. I like that attitude better than "I need saving." 

Ugh, what do I write now? My mouth hasn't been hurting as much lately so that's good. I don't want to write for the rest of the day, or read for that matter. I want to play around. I keep forgetting to focus so I can have fun in one way rather than a bunch of different ways. I dilute the fun and then it's no longer fun. Like having a bunch of small fireworks instead of one big one. I got this game I want to play called Chained Echos but I can't motivate myself to play it. I'd rather play something dumb and stupid than thought-provoking. I'm so crittical of the game too. I need more discipline. Or motivation.