TPA 66

I've been doing well with my Artist's Way assignments. It's been a liberating experience I wish I had done a lot sooner. I just wish it was faster but healing takes time and I have plenty of time. For now. If I get that job I will have to change my habits in both life and writing. Maybe I can still make it. I don't think I want to be Stephen King again but I do want to try to emulate his style. This is hard. I'm also writing later than usual because I woke up late. My additional dose of medicine is making me stay awake late into the night. Right now, I'm watching someone talk about Grand Theft Auto 5, a game that's twelve years old. Gamers all thought that this was where it was at with gaming. The pinacle of design and gameplay. But not me, I didn't think that. GTA V is fine I guess but I recall going through a lot of slog. Lots of driving around, which is good if you like cars, but I'm more into platforming gameplay. I was hoping for an open world playground but all I can do is shoot and drive. And occasionally fly. It's not the game I thought it was when I bought it for my Xbox five years after it's release. GTA makes you go through a lot of story bits that remain unresolved in an unsatisfying way while providing gameplay that made me question a lot of reivewers. I remember thinking "This is what everybody's hyped about?" GTA 6 is coming out soon and I'm sure plenty of people will play it. In fact it'll probably be the best selling game of the year. That doesn't include GTA online. GTA V brings in billions with a B to their parent company. I don't see the appeal. It's hard for me to put my finger on what in particular I don't like about GTA. Maybe it was how boring the side content was. Things like the stock market aspect that was affected by your actions and missions in game which is something I think they pulled from game a few years ago. Which is fine, I never plan to revisit GTA V again. I think I enjoyed Jak 2 more than any of the GTA games because that game had story to spare and characters I cared about. That's the bar I hold all games when it comes to open world. I've been working on this for about an hour and I don't have much to say. I'm not depressed like I usually am on days when I'm off. I don't feel the need to push myself as hard as I can. I can go at my own pace. I think God is working on me to like myself a little bit more day by day. 

I wrote a letter to myself a few days ago. Here's what it said. Dan Simmons and Stephen King were wrong John. You can do this, you can write and make a living off of it.