TPA 25

One of the things I think about is how David from the Psalms in the Bible was able to praise God in his worst moments. I'd say about half the Psalms, at least the ones written by him, are complaining or crying out to God. I usually want to blame God for my issues. If someone has the power to make the pain stop or to put a billion dollars on your doorstep, you'd expect them to do it, especially if they're family. Maybe it's a trust issue on my end. Anyway there were a few things I wantes to write about today.

The game I mentioned, the water park simulator? It has similar aspects to it that I find in many other sim games. One of the biggest ones which is both a blessing and a curse is how these games throw a lot at you in a short amount of time. My favorite, "Tavern Manager Simulator" makes your clean dishes, sweep, water horses, cook food, wipe tables, and take a frying pan to any would-be thieves. The same happens in the water park sim but instead I'm cleaning graffiti, scrubbing pools, serving food, wiping puddles, draining pools of pee and poop, and pushing scared patrons into the pool so someone else can get a turn on the slide. I like how you're forced to learn fast, the game won't leave you hanging though. You're allowed to hire helpers and assign them tasks. The frantic pacing of the game makes it both fun and a nightmare. Sometimes I would walk by and see rows of graffiti on my port-a-johns because I was too busy getting someone a hotdog. It's impossible to do everything but it's fun in a chaotic way and you have to bring order to it. One of my favorite things to do after the day is finished is to go around and clean or fix any chairs, slides, or pools that were used. It's still in early access and the market is flooded with these sims to the point that they could be considered slop with the ease in which they're put out.

I had a thought the other day that my notes here are like bread crumbs for my thought process, epecially when it comes to writing or my diary here. I don't have any more thoughts about that but I thought that statement was neat.

I remembered something important from a while back. I wrote an RTF story based on critiquing another story. There's this anime I got into for a brief time, and by brief, I mean one episode. It was a fantasy anime about a duo, a guy and a girl, who were searching for these super weapons to give to their king. They do this because the other countries are using them to destroy each other and they want to unite everybody. It's obvious that the writer doesn't know the danger behind this idea. Maybe I didn't give the anime enough episoded before turning it down but it just seemed stupid to me that putting all the cashes of the super weapons in one place would seem, at least to them, be a good idea. I don't remember much of this anime but I do recall that the hero had eyes that could let him see and copy magic without practice. It felt like a nod to Naruto but that kind of power should be reserved for an antagonist, not the hero. The hero can never be too powerful. So, I wrote a story about these two characters and how they bump into one of my characters, my R in the RTF. R ends up stealing the weapon from under their noses in an attempt, on my part to, correct their flawed thinking. I think that's how a lot of stories get written, People read something and say "No, no, no. The story should go this way." I think I'll revisti that story someday when I find a way to make R less preachy. He's taking the weapon because he knows that it's wrong for one country to have all the power. Balance, like every super power having nukes, is important to world stability. We might evolve out of this someday but for now, the ability to destroy the world is something that keeps war at bay. There are still wars out there but the threat of a nuke is like what Rosevelt said "Speak softly and carry a big stick." I'm not a political expert but look at Ukraine. They're suffering because they don't have the power to defend themselves, not that nukes would make this war better. It would probably be worse for all. But a country has to have the ability to defend itself, in my opinion, or someone is going to walk over you.

Final part I wanted to talk about was about myself. My folks are taking classes to help me out. The government pays for parents or guardians who know how to take care of people like me. Even though I'm high functioning, I still need help and a watchful eye over me. My dad read somewhere that people who are on the spectrum, sometimes have the worst days when it's the same day over and over instead of a good or bad day. I can relate to that. Sometimes a normal day hits harder than a bad one and a bland day can make you despair. I wonder why that happens. 

Finally, I had a dream about a guy who can influence people with his own bad thougths. He casts them out onto others and makes them hurt themselves or worse. I've decided to try and combine that story with the one I had about the girl who started fires with her tazer. I think it can work. Update: I just found the story but I'm going to work on my Cain story for now. I want to use it as practice becasue if I wait too long it will stick in my head and I'll never be able to pull it out. It's like concrete.