Three Pages Attempt 8

Yesterday was a failure. I blame the lack of sleep. I've been sleeping in a strange way; a deviation from my normal writing style. I need to keep up the pace, this practice of writing three pages every day takes about a month for it to really kick in. Who know what it will do to my confidence. I'm too scared to look at my Tooth Story. What if, no, when I mess up, what do I do? I can't build a reputation if I don't have one and I can't build one if I don't put my stuff out there for others to read and critique. I spent two weeks in turmoil thinking about this story and I think today I MIGHT be able to look at it and correct it. It was fun writing in the dark, as King says, but now I have to put it in the light. How do I do that? I don't know how to edit, or write for that matter. I know how to do research for a project, that's it. I just put so much pressure on myself. God, if you're reading this, help me overcome this problem. 

I think I'm just used to my problems being solved with medicine or devices. Like my CPAP or the pills I take to keep me sane. It's a scary world out there and people don't let you get off your own petard. Instead, they expect you die on your mountain. The world is so evil it scares me. 

We got a new resident yesterday. It was the same day that they finally fixed my washing machine. I've been waiting a month and a half for that device to be fixed. It's both a curse and a blessing because now I don't spend as much time working. There's always something to do but at the end of the day you don't want to do something extra, like mopping the floor. Especially since it takes a lot out of me. Mopping kills my back. Speaking of which, I've been working my back out with daily exercises. If I could only do them at night too I'd be set. Tomorrow I have to go to exercise and see my therapist. Two meetings in one day is not for me. I also have to work tomorrow so I'm not looking forward to that. I don't know what I want today. I thought this exercise would help but my self-doubt is killing me. 

I forgot to mention that I told someone my last name and they said I had a 'Black Name." What does that even mean? I always thought it was white given that I'm supposedly related to Stonewall Jackson. I don't know if I'm related to anyone famous or not. I spent this morning playing games intstead of doing my routine writing. I don't know what to do about myself. These days I'm off, you'd think I'd get more out of them but I spend most of the days off sleeping. I hate it, I'd rather play games and read books. I feel like I NEED to improve myself. I NEED to catch up to Stephen King or Harlan Ellison. I NEED to be better. But I have this disability called autism that holds be back. Why can't God just cure me? I'm tired of being me. I get on my own nerves, I make myself sick, as the song goes. I think I hate myself too much or put too much pressure on me. Why do I do that? Maybe I just hink too hard.

Anyway, let's break down Chapter 5 of Gleipnir: Two in One.

Shuichi narrates that a week has passed since they shot the girl. As Claire passes Shuichi, he narrates that nothing has changed. He tries to tell himself that everything is normal when Claire calls him. He's surprised that she has his phone number. The other kids tease him thinking that his girlfriend is calling him. Shuichi tries to brush it off until Claire stands behind him with her phone. She demands that Shuichi stop ignoring her. Shuichi asks the person on the phone if they can talk later. Do I need something like this? A character that pushes Nicholas? He doens't seem to be the type to jump into problems like this. I think Nicholas wants a normal life and the Eldritch are interupting it. Outside, Claire seems happy since no one has found out about them, or what they did. Claire says that being inside Shuichi while he was the costume was the best thing that's happened to her. She even grabs her butt to reiterate the fact. Distraught, Shuichi is upset that they killed someone. Claire says it was self-defense. Shuichi says he never wants to see her again and if she blabs on him, he'll tell the world what she did. We cut back to a shallow grave where Claire pours gasoline on the corpse of the girl and lights a match. Shuichi looks to be horrified by what they are doing. This sudden jump from normalcy to the impossible is great. I guess Shuichi never thought saving a girl from a fire would lead him to killing and burying someone. I need something like this too. As Shuichi walks off, Claire asks him if he'll be able to fight if another monster comes for him. Shuichi acknowledges that she has a point. "You're way too nice." Claire says that if they work together then no one can beat them. Cut to a picture of a feral transformed Shuichi with Claire in her underwear sitting inside of him. Cut to an abandoned warehouse where Shuichi says he's scared of his powers. He's afraid that its a disease and he might drop dead. Or worse, what if he gets stuck in that form and hurst people. Claire says that even though he was scared of changing, he still saved her. "So you're strong." Claire doesn't know why he can transform or what's the connection to the coin. The next events will probably be worse, so Claire says that if something happens to him, she'll die with him. I like this life/death pact that they are making. Shuichi tests her asking what would she do if he wanted to die right now. Claire climbs to the top of the second floor and says she'll go first. "Then I'll be going on ahead, Shuichi." As she falls, Shuichi transforms and saves her again. We see a scene where she's being cradled by Shuichi. He cries and asks why would she think that. I think that we are getting an inside look at how desperate Claire is to find answers. I think I can use that. We flash back to six months ago. A girl, likely Claire's sister, is talking to a guy by a vending machine. The guy says that he's dropped some coins and can't find them himself. The guy says he'll grant a wish to anyone who finds a coin. The girl asks if the wish can affect people other than herself. We see a close up of her bag with a figureine hanging off it that looks like Shuichi's transformed form. The hints are building up.The mystery thickens.  The guy asks why she would want to affect someone like that. She says that there's someone she wants to be with. So the mystery adds on more to the story and will likely add more to the tension.

Let's move on to the next chapter. 6: When Two Become One.

We cut to the guy who was talking to the girl in the last chapter. He holds up a coin to his phone camera. The camera can't pick it up. This is very Lovecraftian. There are creatures that can't be seen by modern devices. The guy bemoans that only living people can see the coins. "It'll be okay...don't worry. Everyone on this planet is a good person. I'm sure they'll find you." We cut to a wide shot of the guy and can see the stars above him. Hinting at the fact that he's an alien. Cut to Claire's apartment, she says that "It's such a Sunday." Shuichi is with her. "How exactly is it any more of a a Sunday than usual? I don't get it." This is such a carefree, girly thing to say. It's something a teen would say. Claire says that everyone is calm. Shuichi asks if they can get it over with. Claire agrees and starts stipping to Shuichi's horror. Claire explains that she's going to go back inside of him. She says that if they start looking into the coins and his powers, other people might attack. Now that they are together, it's a good time to practice. "Now come on and turn into the puppy." Shuichi agrees but asks why she's taking off her clothes. "Well, to put it bluntly, being insdie you makes me really wet." Shuichi blushes. Claire says that being inside of him is really hot. "Plus, whatever juices you've got inside of you get all over me." She says this as she takes off her panties. Shuichi covers his eyes, half-looking, half-seeing. "No...but if you go inside me naked..." "It's fine...we've already done it once before." "'Done it?'" "Become one." Shuichi screams as she takes off everything, his fingers hinding her bits. Cut ahead to where Claire is wearing a swimsuit. Shuichi explains that it solves the problem if she gets wet. "Well, that taught me quite a bit about you." "That's not what I meant, and you know it!!" Claire asks if he's ready and steps inside Shuichi. We see an image of a foot going through Shuichi's chest. Shuichi feels weird. It's like a pair of lovers' first time. Sheesh, the sexual connotation is ridiculous. Yet, my inner teen loves it. Once they combine, Shuichi monologues that he can feel Claire inside of him. "You're all tense." "I'm fine." "You're lying. I can feel how tightened up you are." For their first test, Claire asks him to move around. Claire is jerked around while still inside. She asks if he can pick up a cup. As Shuichi goes for the cup, he stops. Claire says she's stopping him. She proceeds to tickle him with his own hands. Cut ahead to Claire laying on the floor. She's tired. Claire says that while they take a break they should talk about her sister. Claire has her old school uniform. She notes that when she was inside Shuichi the first time, she noticed how powerful his sense of smell was. If he was able to find her in a fire, he should be able to sniff out her sister. This test of powers is neat. It adds to the character development. Claire rejoing Shuichi who asks if she saw Claire kill their parents. Claire says that she didn't. She says that six months ago she saw a monster that looked like her sister at their home. Shuichi says that he can feel a little bit of what Claire is feeling. I'm noticing that there isn't any family ties to Shuichi. It's like he's alone in this world. This was probably done to keep things simple for Shuichi. Shuichi says he can feel stress and confusion coming from her. Claire encourages him to proceed. Shuichi narrates that he has to find out why he has this body and if what he did (cut to when he shot the girl) had any meaning. Close up on Shuichi's nose, he says that the uniform smells nice. Claire smiles almost laughing at Shuichi's perviness. Shuichi suddenly smells a lot of other things. He can tell that there's a lot of blood on the uniform. "I smell blood...and...not just from one of two people. So...so many...I was wrong. It doesn't matter what she say. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt. The one who killed Claire's parents...was this monster." Claire exits Shuichi. She says that it looks like thing have gotten a lot worse. Shuichi says that they should go and find her sister. 

I wonder if can go further with another chapter. I've got the time and the medicine so I'll do it after I take a nap.

I've changed my mind, I'm editing.